I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
