it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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