no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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