No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
