I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
