i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
