You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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