It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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