We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Randomize
