I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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