Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
