she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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