It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
