Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
