Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
