I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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