just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
