Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize