i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize
