dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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