hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I'm passing your future prison.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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