so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
