Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
