She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
