we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
