she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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