i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
smell my finger.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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