Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
