No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
