Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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