I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
