Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
