found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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