i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
