Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
We need to get me chipped asap
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
