Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Sorry my hands just texted you
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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