Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
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