He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
