shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
