she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
