Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
