i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
