apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
