3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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