jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize