I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
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