I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
one might say we're banned from that church
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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