Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
