They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
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