I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
